In The Beginning.....

God created the Heavens and the Earth and populatedthe Earth with broccoli and cauliflower and spinach, green and yellow and red vegetables of all kinds, so Man and Woman would live long and healthylives.

Then using God's great gifts, Satan created Ben and Jerry's and KrispyCreme Donuts. And Satan said, "You want chocolate with that?" And Man said"Yeh," and Woman said, "and another one with sprinkles." And they gained 10 pounds. And the stockholders were very happy. And Satan smiled.

And God created the healthful yogurt that Woman might keep the figurethat Man found so fair. Satan brought forth white flour from the wheat, and sugarfrom the cane and combined them. And Woman went from size 6 to size 14.

So God said, "Try my fresh green salad." And Satan presented Thousand-Island Dressing, buttery croutons andgarlic toast on the side. And Man and Woman unfastened their belts following the repast.

God then said, "I have sent you heart healthy vegetables and olive oilin which to cook them." And Satan brought forth deep fried fish and chicken-fried steak so bigit needed its own platter. Hilltop Steak House thrived! And man gained moreweight and his cholesterol went through the roof.

God created a light, fluffy white cake, named it "Angel Food Cake," andsaid "it is good." Satan then created chocolate cake and named it "Devil's Food."

God then brought running shoes so that his children might lose thoseextra pounds. And Satan gave cable TV with a remote control so Man would not have totoil changing the channels. And Man and Woman laughed and cried before theflickering blue light and gained pounds. Then

God brought forth the potato, naturally low in fat and brimmingwith nutrition. And Satan peeled off the healthful skin and sliced the starchy centerinto chips and deep-fried them. And Man gained pounds.

God then gave lean beef so that Man might consume fewer calories andstill satisfy his appetite. And Satan created McDonald's and its 99-cent double cheeseburger. Then said "You want fries with that?" And Man replied, "Yeh! And super size 'em."And Satan said "It is good." And Man went into cardiac arrest.

God sighed and created quadruple bypass surgery.

Then Satan created HMOs.